When Ramadan Feels Heavy: Navigating Emotional Challenges During the Holy Month
Sumayyah Rawashdeh, Psychotherapist
When Ramadan comes around each year, it brings with it an air of excitement, celebration, and joy. Yet, for those facing emotional hardships, a sense of isolation can quickly emerge. The contrast between the energy of Ramadan and the heaviness felt internally often causes a disconnect and leaves one feeling lost and alone. While these feelings can be overwhelming, our Islamic tradition offers a path to navigating our emotions.
Recognizing Your Grief
Oftentimes, the emotional pain that emerges during Ramadan is actually a form of grief. We usually associate grief with death, but grief often comes with any type of loss, including the symbolic loss of a life that was and/or a life that could have been. If your Ramadan this year looks different than last year due to a change in life circumstances such as relationship status, parenthood, illness, financial situation, etc., you may notice that grief comes up for you. Similarly, if you’re feeling stuck in a life circumstance that you’re unable to change immediately, you may find yourself mourning a vision of your life that you long for. Understanding the underlying nature of your pain can be the first step to feeling relief and ease.
Acknowledgement is Healing
It may sound too simple, but there is great power in acknowledging the heaviness that oneself or another is experiencing. So much so that in the Quran, Allah (SWT) frequently acknowledges the emotional experience of the Prophet SAW. One example is in Surah Al-Anam, verse 33, where Allah SWT says:
قَدۡ نَعۡلَمُ إِنَّهُۥ لَیَحۡزُنُكَ ٱلَّذِی یَقُولُونَۖ…﴿ ٣٣ ﴾
We certainly know that what they say grieves you ˹O Prophet˺… (6:33).
Imagine how deeply seen the Prophet SAW felt when this verse was revealed. Through this verse, Allah SWT provides a timeless model of acknowledgement as a means of moving through difficult emotions.
Practical Steps
Make time each day to check in with yourself. Rather than waiting for a chunk of time to free up, choose a part of your daily routine to attach some introspection to. For example, while doing a mindless chore or getting ready to sleep.
When checking in, ask yourself the following questions: what thoughts have been occupying my mind today? How is my body feeling? Are there areas of tension? Which emotions were present for me throughout the day?
Acknowledge your experience. This may feel foreign at first, but it will become more natural with practice. An acknowledgement can be as simple as pressing your hand to your heart and telling yourself: “I felt really sad today and it was hard to get things done.” Practice staying in the moment and observing how it feels for you.
Seek connection from Allah and trusted loved ones. This life is not meant to be navigated alone, for even the Prophet SAW sought council and connection through his close companions.
Navigating emotional challenges in Ramadan doesn’t need to be isolating. By understanding your pain, acknowledging the heaviness, and making space for self reflection, you take a crucial step towards healing.